"can i get yo number?"

Those charming men of Manhattan. Special gems that light up this city. I can always count on you for unwanted catcalls and bug-eyed stares toward my backside. I am on an express train to Heaven with all the "God bless you, Baby"'s I receive a day. Thank you for keeping my confidence soaring whenever I walk down the street in sweatpants with a TECH t-shirt sans make-up and deodorant. One of the best lines I have ever gotten was, "Good Morning, Your Highness." Not bad, not bad. That guy at least got a smile out of me. We all know I would wear a tiara everyday if I was sure it wouldn't get snatched on the subway from some intimidating Bronx teenage girl.

When I first moved to New York I spent a lot of time just wandering the streets shopping. I frequented the Times Square area just because I had no idea where else to go. In my heels and skinny jeans I felt like a native bustling through the streets. A native, however, would never have fallen prey to this homeless man's charm.

"Girrrrrllll, if you were a couple inches taller you could be America's Next Top Model!"

"What?! I'm already in 3 inch heels!" I holler back.

"Yeah, but those girls are tall! But, for serious, you could do it!"

"Thank you!!!"

"Do you got a dollar?" I think I gave him a $5.

The other day I was casually walking down my street doing a little grocery shopping. I didn't look my best, but I was decent enough for public appearances. Random guy shouts, "Heyyyyyy, what's yo name?"

Like most respectable Manhattan women, I ignored him, put on my blue tinted Aviators and hoped my headphones would provide the universal sign of "I don't care to hear what you're saying". His friend, however, was not happy about my rude dismissal.

"Yo UGLY!" He screamed at me.

I kept walking forward thinking this was an innocent mistake and he surely was speaking to someone else.

"HEY! YO...UGLY...!"

Okay, nowwww it's personal. I stopped in my tracks for about 5 seconds and thought about what I should do next. Keep on walking and go home? Eat an entire pizza in self-pity? No. THIS warranted attention.

"Ummm, okay. First of all, definitely NOT ugly! I can look a whole lot hotter than I do right now in this 100 degree weather. Secondly, congratulations on getting a girl to at least talk to you. If you were above 5'4" I'd let you buy me a drink. But I'm actually not sure if you are a 15-year-old or underdeveloped adult."

I then VERY promptly turned around and walked faster than I have in my entire life into the closest Duane Reade where I knew I couldn't be harmed.

This is one of the few disadvantages of living in NYC. I have never experienced this kind of obsessive "hollering" in any other city I've lived in. However, as excessive and irritating as it can get, I know that when I'm having a bad day I can walk down my street and find some guy that will, without a doubt, have something positive to say about my ass.