Today I babysat two of my most favorite people in the world. Emma (11) and Carla (7). I could hang with these girls all day. They are raised in your typical Upper East Side high-rise apartment and attend an all girls private school. However, they do not possess a single quality of your typical child raised in these conditions. For Halloween Emma is going to be a goth-fairy and Carla is dressing as a nerd. I hope their parents know how awesome they are.
I know I shouldn't pick favorites....but Carla is hilarious. Things Carla said to me today:
1. "You knowwwww....after you're born.....when your vocal cord gets cut?"
Me: "You mean....umbilical cord?"
Carla: "Yeah! Thats it!"
2. "What's a vampires favorite cereal?"........"BLOOD CEREAL"
3. "I wish this sandwich didn't have the cheese in it. I really enjoy the TASTE of things."
4. "Am I driving you crazy?"
Me: "Yes."
Carla: (runs over and hugs me) "I promise I won't ask for anything else."
5. "I don't like peanut butter!"
Me: "Well, then we can't be friends anymore."
Carla: "BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE PEANUT BUTTER?!?!"
6. (Getting out of a crowded elevator) "And you all have a nice day today!"
She should have her own reality show.
Emma and I watched the season finale of Project Runway. Her knowledge of good fashion is refreshing and we were able to carry on lengthy conversations regarding the judges final decisions.
After leaving their apartment I was feeling nostalgic. So, now I share with you some intros to awesome TV shows from when I was a kid.
I'm babysitting tonight. In a hotel room. With no internet. And the parents aren't coming home for…..::checks clock::….ANOTHER 4 AND A HALF HOURS!?! Ohhh geezzzz, sing out Louiseeeee!!! I'm afraid that if I turn on the television the kiddos will awake from their slumber and want to watch. Which would typically be okay with me, however, as most of us know, 2-year-olds win all arguments and it would be a couple hours of Yo, Gabba Gabba. Never seen/heard of it? Here's a treat for ya….
....okay, I admit, it's catchy...
I went to Target today to buy items for my Halloween costume. I'm being "Twitter" this year. As in, the website, www.Twitter.com. I know….ADORABLE! I'll post pictures after Halloween festivities so you can see how it was done.
As I was purchasing Twitter-like products, I got to thinking….I have never purchased an actual Halloween packaged costume. Ever since I can remember all my costumes were homemade. Mom made our costumes until we were about 12 or 13. Then she said we were too old to trick-or-treat and she didn't want us to be "those kids" that act like hoodlums and run a muck around the neighborhood.
Throughout my childhood years I made the sewing easy on my mom and was either a cheerleader or 50's girl with a poodle skirt. I loved that poodle skirt. One year I got really creative and went as "Secretary Butterfly." Apparently I was very familiar with the woman's status in the insect workplace….
I became a little more inventive in college. Freshman year I had bright red hair, so I decided to go as "Daphne" from Scooby Doo. NOW, keep in mind, the manufactured "Daphne" Halloween costume had not been created yet. I made this one up all by myself. I even had a stuffed Scooby Doo doll with me for the night.
The next year I suggested to my boyfriend at the time we dress as 80's aerobics instructors. Yes. I made an 80's mix tape to put in my walkman and led the party with a routined jazzercise workout.
Another year I was a roller disco girl. At the time it seemed like a good idea but hopping in and out of bars in roller-skates is a whole lot harder than it looks. I don't know how I managed to not break an arm.
The 60's flower child is my go-to. When I have waited until the last minute to find a costume and it is 30 minutes until my friends are meeting up for Halloween festivities, I reach into my closet and pull out my vintage 60's dress. This treasure has saved me on many occasions. I then use some makeup to color a flower around my eye…throw some daises in my hair and call it a night.
Picture guide: (1) 2005 pictured with Napoleon and Pedro. (2) 2007 pictured with Bernie (3) 2008 pictured with Sarah
Last year I was a penguin. I painted my nose orange with what I thought was washable face paint. I learned the hard way that it's not a good idea to fall asleep without washing your face. If you don't you'll end up with an orange nose for 3 days.
Okay, kids, you all have a super duper Halloween. Play safe. Party hard. Be creative.
I'm not feeling so stellar today. The landlord turned the heat on in my apartment a few days ago. You ask, "Karen, how is this relevant to your current state of health?" Well, the knob to the radiator is broken and that prohibits me from turning the heat down or more importantly, OFF. This creates extremely dry conditions in my bedroom resulting in cold-like symptoms and an unhappy tenant. I like to blame others for bad things that happen to me so I am sending bad vibes to my landlord for being such an idiot and neglecting to make sure my life runs smoothly.
On a positive note, I'm getting "Home Work" completed (tweaking website, updating resumes, watching You Tube, thinking of cleaning the kitchen).
Speaking of the kitchen, I was JUST in there cooking up some mediocre lunch on the stove and came back in here to check my Facebook because it had been over 10 minutes since I looked at it last. APPARENTLY, I left a Dollar Store Tupperware-like container a little too close to the burner and check what happened...
Yeah....I know.....oops. It's been that kind of week. At Dunkin' Donuts the other day I was getting a coffee and donut with the least amount of calories so as to maintain my dignity. As the guy behind the counter handed me my goodies he said, "Thank you, Sir." Nice. Very nice. I already feel like a complete lard for just stepping in here but now YOU go for the double whammy and insult my face. That was a really good donut though. I'll still come back to the double D for more.
Let's address what you're thinking.... Yes, that is The Shining playing in the background of my "Cooking Fail" picture. Another plus to "staying home sick." Did you know the baseball bat scene with Shelley and Jack took 127 takes? It's a world record for most retakes of a single scene with dialogue. Just a little trivia for you. You never know when you might be on Jeopardy.
I hope you watched the Scream Awards. Let's talk about Bill Murray. SPOILER ALERT!! If you haven't seen it and want to watch it...just don't watch the clip.
I have such a crush on him. If he asked me out I would totally go. Seriously.
Things I Like To Imagine Bill Murray Would Say To Me If We Met
1) Your controlled eye twitch is the funniest thing since Space Jam
2) The Marshmallow man was made of real marshmallows
3) I like that you chose to eat at this cheeseburger joint
4) Jurassic Park is my favorite soundtrack, too
5) Let's pick "I'm A Little Bit Country" as our next karaoke duet
6) I put little containers of Ecto-Plazm in my birthday party goodie bags
7) Your NYC Tourist video is in my "Bookmarks"
8) I'm honored you want to name your first born "Tripper Harrison"
9) I can fix your radiator with my bare hands
10) I'm sorry Scrooged scared the hell out of you as a kid, but glad you watch it once a month now.
Alright, that's all I've got. I leave you with a picture of "Snookie." The kitten I played with while I was babysitting last night. Feel free to set it as your background. You're welcome.
